Good afternoon friends and neighbors, its time again for
another “Legal Advice”. Wow, we've done four of these? Sheesh. Well, since we are in
the throes of the presidential race, let’s take a look at one of the most
popular superhero teams ever assembled, the Justice League, and find out if ANY
of the qualify for President of the United States.
For this, we’re going to look at the most common line up for
the Justice League, that of Green Lantern, Martian Manhunter, the Flash, Wonder
Woman, Superman, Cyborg, Aquaman, and Batman.
Well this will be short: Martian Manhunter, Wonder Woman, and Aquaman
are not natural born citizens of the United States.
In the Twelfth Amendment, Article II, Section I, Clause 5 of
the Constitution of the United States, it dictates that in order to run for the
office, you must be a natural born citizen of the United States. That immediately knocks out the above three,
almost half our contenders, right there.
So we are left with Green Lantern, Batman, the Flash, Cyborg
and Superman. But wait, I hear you
already, Superman was born on Krypton, not Earth, he can’t run either.
Well, that greatly depends on your definition of his origin
story. The generally accepted version is
that he was born on Krypton and rocketed as a baby to Earth where he crashed
and yada yada yada. Frankly if you’ve
been following this blog, or looked at one of my previous Legal Advice posts,
you know the origin.
Generally accepted, but not entirely accurate. After the “Crisis on Infinite Earth”
storyline revamped DC Comics continuity, it was written that Superman’s fetus
was placed inside a “birthing matrix” and that was shot to Earth. So, by that definition, he was actually born
on Earth, since that is where he emerged as a fully formed newborn. Which is ultimately their way of justifying
not shoving a newborn into a rocket. This
has been glossed over since then because the wildly popular Superman film
starring Christopher Reeve presented the golden age telling of the origin so
that because what everyone accepted at the tale, however for the majority of
the 80’s, 90’s and into the 2000’s, the birthing matrix is what stood as the
official, in canon, version.
Now things get trickier from there, because left or right,
baby in a rocket or birthing matrix, it doesn’t matter because now you need PROOF
of birth. Now, we established early on,
back in another posting, that legally speaking Superman does not exist as a
person. He doesn’t own property, there
is no social security numbered issued to one “Man, Super”, he does not exist as
a citizen. Clark Joseph Kent, on the
other hand, does and he has a birth certificate, generated at the time he was a
foundling and adopted by ma and pa Kent, and it’s readily available through
archives in whatever county Smallville resides in Kansas.
Birth certificates are not that hard to find, folks. Don’t let the media fool you.
ANYWAY, legally speaking, Superman, or at least Clark Kent,
is a natural born American citizen. So
he’s still in the running.
Know who isn’t?
Cyborg. Cyborg, or
Victor Stone, is formerly of the Teen Titans and graduated, literally, to the
big leagues to fight alongside Batman and company. As he’s the youngest of the team, he’s
roughly in his early to middle twenties.
Ray Fisher, who portrays him in the cinematic universe is only around
27-28. This is problem because, again,
according to the constitution a candidate for President must be no younger than
35. Sorry Cy, you’re going to sit this
one out.
That gives us Flash, Green Lantern, Batman AND Superman.
So what could possibly whittle this list down? First let’s admit it…Batman isn’t going to
win this election. Because he’s Batman.
The very second Bruce Wayne puts his hat into the ring for
President, one of the dozen supervillains who know his secret identity is going
to announce it to the world, and he will immediately be arrested for the
countless felonies he’s committed as the caped crusader. The FBI takes a dim view to that sort of
thing. Further, he’s not likely to even
try to run for public office because he has a very strong psychological need to
be Batman. So for the Dark Knight, the
race never started.
Now we have Superman, Green Lantern, and Flash…but this is
going to get cut down pretty fast. Green
Lantern spends most of his time in space, which is decidedly not the United
States. Whether this is Hal Jordon, Guy
Gardner, or John Stewart, the Green Lantern’s obligations to daring do in space
requires he spend the majority of his time off world, which kind of makes it
difficult to hold down a job and pay for residence. You must be a resident of the United States,
for 14 years before you can be president.
You can have your American citizenship and go all over the world, live
in France or Canada if you want, but in order to get the job you must actually
hold residence inside the borders of the United States. This also trips up Superman because
technically he splits his time between the Fortress of Solitude AND Metropolis,
calling both homes. So which has been
his residence for 14 consecutive years?
That brings us down to just one candidate: The Flash. For the sake of this we’re using Barry Allen
since he’s the name we all know. He’s
got a job, forensic scientist for the Central City Police Department and is
therefore a resident of said city for over 14 years. In the comics Barry is in his mid 30’s, which
meets our next qualifier. He’s a natural
born American citizen. You can probably
find the actual doctor who delivered him.
Outside of a sense of responsibility to his fellow man with his powers
and probably no political background, there is nothing to stop Barry from being
the President of the United States.
So…I’m voting for the Flash.
How about you?
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